You don’t know until it’s too late.

I love living in a small town in rural Kansas. Maybe I’m crazy, but it feels welcome here. Everything I need is a short drive down the road, and the weather is fantastic. You might believe that last line, but not if you’re from the Midwest. The weather is a special kind of stupid here. This is our third day of Tornado Watches splashed across my TV screen.

Why can’t tornadoes ask if we want them around. Of course we’d say no. They’re pretty inconsiderate. Watching my windows getting pounded by hail and tree branches has really taught me about life. Like homeowner’s insurance is a good thing to have and can calm anxiety significantly. I’ve also learned that cats get super hateful during storms. They also want to cuddle, despite the fact that all they really wanna do is claw your face off. Also, haunted houses in thunderstorms basically suck.

But obviously the most important thing here, is that I have 5 cans of ice cold PBR left.


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